Peanut Butter Pickles and Mayo
  • Debi Flory

Learning From Face Book Rantings: Ah, so much to learn…

10/28/2013

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I am dually bothered and humored by some of the pronouncements on Facebook.  I am all for ranting.  I think I might have invented it. In the art of Spiritual Direction, (for those not in the know, I am a Spiritual Director) our training-focus centers on listening, not just to God and our Directees, but also to self.  It is extremely important to recognize when our own buttons are pushed – buttons that reveal our feelings of anger, our tears, laughter, or any feeling that stops the director in the middle of a session and takes them from being present in the moment.  A Spiritual Director helps others listen to the spirit and Directees are seeking direction in their lives from God in the presence of God and a Spiritual Director.  My emotions, as a Director, appear in the session, of course.  Moments and events that distract me from the presence are tucked neatly in the back of my head so that I can deal with them with my own Spiritual Director and my Supervisor.  It’s a beautiful, learning process for all.  

Thus, it is sometimes a bit difficult to turn that process off when I am browsing social media and run upon a rant, whether the rants are political, spiritual, or personal.  I’m especially intrigued by the anger bandwagon so many jump on in their moment of anger.  Someone will say something, labeling, screaming, and denouncing the opinions of others while making a statement of their own.  I am sure I can find something close to it in my own Facebook history.  Something touches me so strongly; I type a response to a posting without stopping to ask myself where the anger is coming from.  It doesn’t always stop there.  Oftentimes, the ranter makes a statement based on what appears to be fact, when it is actually just words from another ranter.

I’m especially drawn to a repeated one-paragraph rant that appears over and over again.  It goes something like this, “People need to remember our country was founded on Christianity and guns.”  So, first of all, I have no problem with people owning guns, and most certainly I support Christianity in its pure form.  So when I look at this rant, I scratch my head because it seems so divisive and not quite on point.

I saw this rant about 4 times last week.  I wanted to stop and reply, but I had no idea what I would say.  What is so wrong (if anything) about it?  Why does it feel so in your face?

In fact, I was sitting in a place of judgment with the statement rather than analyzing my reaction to the button(s) being pushed as I read it.

After thinking about it for a while, I came to a temporary understanding.  I say temporary because I don’t have the exact history stored in my head and I realize I need to research the history before I make an educated statement…if I make one at all… (at least on Facebook.  I guess I'm making one here, but this is MyBook, not Facebook!)

The “founded on Christianity and guns” statement just makes me cringe.  Then it brings up all sorts of questions.  Didn’t the founders flee England to get away from religious suppression?  Even though it seems they were a religion that seems suppressive, linear and not very loving.  Yet, their foundation of faith is similar to mine.  The Puritan’s relationship (at first) with the local natives was positive, even cordial. The Native Americans helped the English survive their first winter and taught them the cultivation of corn and the practice of using fish to fertilize their fields.  We all learned that in elementary history and probably acted it out in a Thanksgiving play.  (That was my first exposure to “Indian Corn.”

That kind of help, offered from the Indians, is the same kind of help the organization Freedom From Hunger has adopted today, helping others with the spirit of the proverb, “Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.” 

Obviously, this kind of kindness was learned from somewhere.  The Spiritual practices of the Native Americans seemed peaceful, productive, kind and loving.  Why, oh why was it so important to disturb those practices rather than learn from them?  Why is it so important to be right? How did the actions of the Puritans defile their beliefs?  They preached their doctrines without practicing them with others who did not see it the way they did.  Rather than preach love they preached fear.  Love our way, or you aren’t really loving.  Yet, the lessons and generosity of those Native Americans were eventually set aside and the thanks they received from those they helped included disease, rape and stealing of their land.  In the moment, I am sure the Puritans thought they were “helping” these kind natives in return for their generosity, because they were offering eternal salvation.  If they could have sat for any length of time with the spirit of their actions, how could they have felt right about it? 

We have so many pictures of Christians that it is hard to call myself Christian without explaining what it means to me.  I have been told I am not a good Christian because I love and honor those of other faiths and I am not completely Bible based. (Says who?)  I am Christian because I believe Jesus had an answer that helps me love others and do my best to help others.   My relationship with Jesus is personal. I refuse to get into battles about salvation and choose not to take personally the statements of well-meaning Christians that say unless I profess that Jesus Christ is Lord and savior and died for me, I will not go to heaven. I'm a rebel, and will choose how to profess my faith,or not, in ym own way. How and when I make those statements probably have nothing to do with anyone’s salvation if my actions become devisive and fear-based.  I want to live the word not bash people over the head with it.  I cannot and will not make the judgment for God, and will not knowingly say anything that separates me from loving someone else. (And - I admit I wish I could practice what I preach 100%  Confession is good for the soul, they say!) (And the ranter in me says, "If you want to tell me how to practice my faith, you might just as well jump the next ship back to the Mother Land.   phhtt :P)

So,saying we were founded on Christianity is a generality. Telling people to like it or leave it smacks of the Anglican Church from which the Puritans fled to found a nation without religious restrictions.  A side note is that the Puritans then tried to prove their religion was better than the Anglican Church.  That was lack of focus.  Believing to be "better than thou" seemed to backfire on them."

Our founding father, Thomas Jefferson wrote:  We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness. 

Notice the label “Creator” not Jesus Christ, not Mother Nature, not Allah, not God, etc.  It was an inclusive statement and I am grateful for it.  It means we have the right to walk our journeys, including our spiritual journeys with a freedom that was unbeknownst to the new world people.

So – take another look at the statement, “our nation was founded on Christianity.”  If you really believe it, then take a look at your own rants filled with name-calling and labeling others who are not Christian. It is not Christ-like.  Next, notice the feeling inside when you post something like that.  Is it a feeling of kindness?

As far as a country being founded on guns?  Not.  But guns were important to the founding of a wilderness nation.  It was a time when reloading was manual.  It was a time before organized law enforcement and a time before the military could provide standardized weapons.  It was a time when people needed to both defend themselves and provide food for the table. We weren’t founded on guns, but used discernment to advocate the right to bear arms.  It is still a right, and I haven’t really heard anyone saying, “take everyone’s gun away.”  (I’m sure they exist, but have to be a minority) I do see that there is a lack in discerning what weapons really need to be supported in our world. 

People of high intelligence and wisdom who dare look at gun control are being called idiots and are accused of wanting to take away the rights of others.  Those statements are reckless.  It is a given that guns don’t kill people, people kill people, but it’s too much of a generality.  Criminals kill people.  People full of hate and anger, kill people.  Most gun owners are full of love and honor.  People without honor kill senselessly.  People with mental disorders kill people.  We cannot control that.  We can be mindful of this as we make sense out of our right to bear arms.  This should be a decision made from a united people that care for one another and care about the rights of everyone.  That means that the rights of those killed senselessly have to be honored.  We forget about them when the gun itself becomes more important than the unjustly deceased.

If not for the gun, Hitler would have ruled us.  If not for the gun, my brother’s family would have gone hungry and been on food stamps for a long time when he was disabled.

I don’t have the answer and this blog wasn’t really to be about gun control, but rants.

It’s a sermon to myself. 

What I love about some of the rants and raves that show up and are endlessly shared by others who are moved in the same direction is that they cause me to pause.  When I feel the flush of anger, embarrassment, confusion and a number of any emotions, I am learning to stop and NOT reply with the first thing that comes to mind. It's also humbling to know, that what I have to say doesn't really matter to most of the world.  The act of saying something is all about ME if I don't write with discernment.  I also find I cannot and should not respond unless I do some research.  I look at history, culture and psychology.  I look up medical terminology.  But most of all, it encourages me to sit with my feelings and question my emotions and see where they may be deeply rooted to a belief that could be based on nothing but the rantings of others.  It happens. Then I decide if what I have to say is helpful.  

Rant on, oh world of Facebook and Twitter.  I say, “Challenge me with your rants!”  Give me something to gnaw on.  I am learning a lot.  I am learning a lot…


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Imagine Happiness

10/23/2013

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I read an article put out on Facebook that really got me thinking today, the kind of thinking that gnaws on you all day until you have to do something about it.  For me, it means sitting in discernment and balancing my brain whose thoughts vacillate between anger and love.  I love my country and personally want to act from a spirit of love and I am angry at our leaders who play games with the people they serve.  I am also that people jump on bandwagons that hurt others rather than lift them up.

The article was:
 Denmark Is Considered The Happiest Country. You'll Never Guess Why.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/22/denmark-happiest-country_n_4070761.html?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl10%7Csec1_lnk3%26pLid%3D395069&utm_hp_ref=fb&src=sp&comm_ref=false#sb=1668623b=facebook                                                              
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Here are a few quotes: 

The six factors for a happy nation split evenly between concerns on a government- and on a human-scale. The happiest countries have in common a large GDP  (gross domestic product) per capita, healthy life expectancy at birth and a lack of corruption in leadership. But also essential were three things over which individual citizens have a bit more control over: A sense of social support, freedom to make life choices and a culture of generosity.

"There is now a rising worldwide demand that policy be more closely aligned with what really matters to people as they themselves characterize their well-being," economist Jeffrey Sachs said in a statement at the time of the report's release.

Danes feel a responsibility to one another

Danes don't prioritize social security and safety simply so they can receive benefits; there's a real sense of collective responsibility and belonging. And this civic duty -- combined with the economic security and work-life balance to support it -- results in a high rate of volunteerism. According to a government exploration of Danish "responsibility":

Denmark is a society where citizens participate and contribute to making society work. More than 40 percent of all Danes do voluntary work in cultural and sports associations, NGOs, social organisations, political organisations, etc. There is a wealth of associations: in 2006, there were 101,000 Danish organisations -- worth noting in a population of just 5.5 million.

The economic value of this unpaid work is DKK 35.3 billion. Combined with the value growth from the non-profit sector, public subsidies and membership fees, the total economic impact of the sector represents 9.6 percent of the Danish GDP.

But that sense of stewardship isn't just extra-governmental: Danes also take pride in their involvement with the democratic process. During the last election in September 2011, for example, 87.7 percent of the country voted. It's not surprising, given these statistics, that the University of Zurich and the Social Science Research Center Berlin have given Denmark the very highest rating for democracy among 30 established democracies.

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I could write forever on this topic.  Some say I was born a descendent of St. Michael, the Archangel – the angel who goes before God fighting for justice.  I’ve been called worse.  And I guess if that’s what I’m doing, great, but it certainly encourages me be the first one to look at myself in the mirror.  I have been known to throw the judgment card more than once.  So, looking in the mirror isn’t always a pretty sight at all.

There will always be someone who will argue this point of view so I just need to put it into rhetorical question format.  Read the entire article, it will make you smile for them and cry for us.  But, it makes me hopeful that there is another way we can live in the world.  I’m so tired of the politically tainted opinion of the news and social media.  Feeding the hungry, caring about one another and encouraging each other to succeed should be the norm not the “enabling” thing to do.

What can possibly be wrong about encouraging one another along the way?  How can helping another out whose need is greater than your own be threatening to your personal wealth?  Why is it necessary to place blanket judgment on those who need assistance and encouragement?  What happened to “What goes around comes around?”  Doesn’t that still mean if you help someone, you will be helped?  So what happens when one places judgment on another without any facts and decides the other is not worthy of help?  What would happen if those “better off than most” decided to feed the poor real food out of their own freezers?  How could that hurt anyone?  Isn’t it the same people who want to rip Food Stamps out of the system the ones who want the churches to do the job instead of the government?  Is it not the same people who believe churches should be taxed?

Could it be that the people who have actually experienced poverty are the first to share their own wealth?  And, when did the word sharing come to be a dirty word?  Doesn’t it seem preposterous that the wealthy can die and leave millions of dollars to their dog and think it’s fine to ignore the hungry?  Are the rich, and famous, and “wise elders” not wise enough to understand the part they play in the poverty game?

It seems Denmark has all their priorities straight.  The focus is on being happy and encouraging everyone to do the right thing.  There are no rewards for bullying those less fortunate.

A lot of my children’s free time in their youth was spent preparing food and serving the poor with their Youth Group friends.  My daughter carries small $1 store jars of peanut butter to hand out to the poor when they ask.  You know, it never hurt her or came back to haunt her?  You know why?  She did it without judgment and without asking the hungry person to show his or her “Poor Credentials,” or prove they couldn’t buy food on their own.  If my hubby stops for take-out food and there is someone asking for money, he buys him or her food and blesses them on their way.  If they wanted the money for alcohol, hubby would never know.  He doesn’t ask and it’s none of his business.  (Enabling a loved one IS a different story; so don’t go AA on me here.  Feeding anyone is okay.)

Taking a look on what makes Denmark tick seems reasonable to me.  Why not learn from someone who’s getting it right?  Seems to me, not much of what’s been happening in the US is making many people happy right now.  I sign off with the sound of John Lennon’s “Imagine” running through my brain.  And then there’s the Young Bloods and their song, “Get Together.”  Ahh, I yearn for those days when it was “Hip” to do the right thing. Come on boomers – remember your roots!

THE YOUNGBLOODS
"Get Together"

Love is but a song to sing
Fear's the way we die

You can make the mountains ring

Or make the angels cry

Though the bird is on the wing

And you may not know why
Come on people now

Smile on your brother

Everybody get together

Try to love one another
Right now
Some may come and some may go

We shall surely pass

When the one that left us here

Returns for us at last

We are but a moment's sunlight
Fading in the grass
Come on people now

Smile on your brother

Everybody get together

Try to love one another
Right now
If you hear the song I sing

You will understand (listen!)

You hold the key to love and fear

All in your trembling hand

Just one key unlocks them both

It's there at you command
Come on people now

Smile on your brother

Everybody get together

Try to love one another
Right now 
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Entitlement – I Ain’t No Good At Eloquence When I’m In A Rant.   And, I love you even if you don’t agree with me…That’s a promise.

10/14/2013

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Disclaimer: The following rant has no statistical basis.  It is not about politics, but rather the basic instinct to love one another and care for each other taught way before the politics we know today.  This instinct is slowly becoming extinct and I can’t sit with that knowledge without putting in my 2-cents worth.  This is also a confession that I’d really like to take a few of our county’s “leaders” (leaders?  HA) and turn them over my knee or walk them to the woodshed.)  For what it’s worth, I feel much better after my ranting, and if you don’t? Okay,  I love you anyway! 

 The word entitlement has been tossed around so much and in so many different ways, it has become confusing for me.

I come from a childhood/adulthood where I’ve been taught and have experienced the unconditional love of family, friends and strangers.  I’ve been fortunate enough to experience the Agape love of both the Walk To Emmaus (for adults) and Chrysalis (teens) weekends for the past 14 years.  “Entitlement” in this venue means everyone is worthy and entitled to be loved through the grace of God.  We are entitled to love without earning it.  We are graced with the love of God and we are charged to love others with the same love.  It is a great gift, this unearned love, but it then becomes an extremely, incredibly difficult gift to pass on if we do not understand grace.

Some new and soon to be retirees have been slapped in the face with the word entitlement.  What used to be EARNED Retirement BENEFITS has been renamed Retirement ENTITLEMENTS.  On the surface, the two words appear to be synonyms, unless one is a dedicated political skeptic, (those who would believe the change of title aligns with the unearned slurs towards welfare recipients as “Entitled” --as in, “they think they are entitled,“ or ”it’s time to make people work for a living and not let them claim entitlement!”  Entitlement has become a slur word.  Now, the feathers of the boomers are ruffled, rightfully so, because they are seemingly put into a category with a minority of people who take advantage of the unemployment/welfare system.

Yes, there are many who take advantage of the generosity of givers, but I believe the majority of people needing financial assistance, especially in the last 6-7 years as people lost their homes (read: Countrywide,) their retirements( read: Enron), investments  (read Wall Street ) have humbly accepted the fact and avoid mentioning the need to others.  

The boomers who lost homes, jobs, funding for children’s education, planned retirements, and the security of a financial future and are delaying retirement do not see Social Security as entitlement but a necessity to survive.  How do I know this?  It happened to us.

It happened and is happening to a lot of people and it was only the genius of my husband, a good financial advisor (that, and putting on our big people panties) that we got through and are getting through our financial catastrophe without totally going under.  We were victimized by mortgage companies, a corporation who manipulated our company buyout to benefit their bulging coffers, while leaving  our little company (us) with all the debt and a 15% decrease in pay IF we decided to stay on.  In the end we ended up with so much debt, it will take us many, many years to pay out the ugliness of that takeover.  We were advised to declare bankruptcy.  Instead, we stepped out in faith and made the decision to enter into negotiations with the companies that worked with us as a business and with our personal accounts.  All but one company, Discover, were gracious in providing us a way to pay back, at minimum, the principal of the money we legitimately owed.  These companies recognized our efforts to pay back, with dignity, the debts we incurred while trying to make payroll and expenses for the loyal workers that worked for us.  They understood it was that or we file for bankruptcy and no one would win.  Discover, refusing to talk to us, sold the debt to collection lawyers who hopefully now find it hard to sleep at night when they are making millions off of those victimized by financial corruption in the banks, wall street and the government.  Or not.  It’s their job, right?  They feed their families with the money that should feed mine.  Discover went so far as to put a lean on our “salvation” home in Oregon, one of two homes so underwater, the lein isn’t worth the paper it was written on.  After their bully attacks and unnecessary court costs we had to bear (including those of that law firm) we were convicted to pay them off first, stoppin gthe finishing construction on our black mold ridden demolished kitchen to do it.  It was worth it to get their despicable name off our mortgage. (So, says Ms. Angry Pants.  Paying them off first was empowering, it really was)

Enough of that...  My point in that rant was to show we have been in a place where any kind of help would have been welcomed and although we chose to figure out a way to avoid the entitlements of welfare, unemployment or food stamps, it was only by the grace of God and a pretty smart husband who is respected as a consultant that we could put food on the table.  But it was touch and go.  Although it feels good to scream with my fingers on a keyboard at injustice and un-kindnesses of companies like that, it doesn’t really matter.  We are the ones that understand that “whatever you do to the least of your brother/sister -- that you do unto God….   Another way of saying that is, whatever you do to anyone else, you do to yourself.  It’s another way of explaining Kharma and those who bully others in any arena end up the losers.  I believe that.

Entitlement.  If I felt entitled, I could have fought harder for bankruptcy, insisted  we use unemployment benefits and food stamps as our first resort.  All our debts would have been wiped away and we’d already be three years into a better credit score, rebuilding a now extinct retirement fund and probably living in a completed home. But we tried a new direction first and it’s working.  Still, having the option was reassuring and kept us from feeling that it was all hopeless.

Right now, I only feel entitlement to being loved in the journey. I know God loves me in all ways and that keeps me grounded while on the journey.

Taking this path has opened a whole new way of looking at judgment.  When I hear people ranting about the “low-life of the land” feeling entitled to welfare or food stamps or unemployment I want to scream.  How dare anyone sit in judgment of anyone.  If you are talking about the handful who do cheat the government, it’s still not okay.  You are not judge and jury of the world, and your unkind words against a minority in the system hurts those who really need the help.  If you believe no one is entitled to financial help in the worst of times, you may never have had the opportunity to plan your menu for a family of four around the $11.00 you have left that week after paying bills.  It can still be done, but using food stamps to supplement that $11 is empowering.  Was I empowered to do the best with that $11.  Yes.  I was Wonder Woman in the kitchen, making nasty estrogen laden bar b q soybean casserole that ended up tasting like dog food and breaking a tooth.  I ate it anyway.  I could do that for myself, but when it came down to it, no one was going to survive long-term on this diet.  The need to feed the kids was an incentive to use the food stamp system until we could stand on our own.  At that time, no one was “shouted out” for thinking they were entitled.  You know why?  Because, welfare and entitlement was started when politicians on both sides cared about the welfare of their people.  Most went through the depression and witnessed first hand the starvation and separation of families.  They witnessed mental breakdowns when men could not provide for their families.  They cut their own cardboard to put into the insoles of their shoes to make them last.  They dropped out of school in sixth grade to work in the hops fields to help support their families.  (My Dad! - love him so...) Welfare as entitlement?  Let me tell you why we ARE entitled to receive the help we need and why we are commanded to provide entitlement.  Because we are commanded to love one another as God has loved us.  Whether you believe in God or not, it is hard to argue with a commandment that only requires generosity of Love without judgment.  That’s all it is.  If one believes the loving thing to do is to withdraw the means to feed your children and then call you names, we have a different problem.  We have people feeling they are entitled to judge everyone else’s life without first looking at themselves.  We have people feeling entitled to make decisions on your life based on their experience, which could be nil.  I don’t know about you, but when someone is on the news screaming and berating anyone on public assistance and their argument is….”Look at ME, I’M successful and I’ve never had to go on welfare", I want to pull an Elvis Presley and shoot the TV.  Trouble is, I don’t have a gun and shooting the TV with my Salad Shooter wouldn’t be too effective.

Boy do I feel better.  I’ll feel even better after I make the statement that Social Security is a Benefit, something that I’ve paid into.  I will benefit from what my employers and I have put into the system.  And, in that sense, it IS an Entitlement.  Entitlements are sometimes earned. (The actual and sobering truth here is that if I wasn’t married, my shabby Social Security would only be $363.00 a month because I chose to stay home with the kids for 33 years.)

The mix-up in terminology these days has made “Entitled” a dirty word.  It’s a “get up off your butt and figure out how to pay your $30,000 medical bill yourself” word.  

“Too bad for you if your company gives you only enough hours so they don’t have to provide medical benefits.”  “Too bad if you are a small business struggling to get back in the game and have horrific medical premiums.”  “Too bad for you.  You should be like me and work for a company that pays for great medical insurance.”  Hah!

Here is what I say, “Everyone is entitled to love.”  It’s like bringing a new ball to the playground and making those who can’t afford to buy their own ball sit out the game.  If one truly believes that’s just the way it is, they have no idea what love is.  We were taught as children on the playground to invite anyone who wants to play into the game.  Exclusivity did not start until narcissism and greed floated to the top of society in the past 25 years.  Scientific statistics?  Don’t have any.

I was taught to give when someone asks.  That is love.  But I was also taught that love sometimes meant saying no so people would not be unhealthily dependent on others.  That is loving too.  The biggest job in all this is being kind and supportive and helping others with more than a check.  It is by giving of self not just money that the recipient learns to pick themselff up and go forward.  Welfare has often come with programs to retrain the single mother, and to encourage companies to hire from a re-entry pool.  When you help others with welfare assistance and strip them of their dignity at the same time, you are responsible for pushing the person over the edge to perpetual unemployment.  Sister Teresa said, “Give Until it Hurts.”  In the case of welfare, we give until it is not a productive thing to do, for us and those receiving.  Recipients are not entitled to take without giving.  BUT, it is a slippery slope of judgment when we withhold aid to anyone.  The system was built with checkpoints and markers.  Only those recipients who are dishonest will continue to steal from the system.  It is up to the system, not me, to do the job and filter out the ones who are stealing.  It isn’t rocket science, it’s due diligence.  And I don’t profess to have the answers and I will not argue with others on the subject.  I just know I cannot discern for everyone on the welfare roles whether they are justified in receiving the benefit.  I cannot keep a thief from stealing, but I can hold my neighbor accountable if they boast they are stealing. 

Of late, I am most enraged when opponents of ACA, the Affordable Care Act call it an Entitlement.  Truly it will become an entitlement, just a  Social Security is an entitlement when looked at truthfully.  We pay into it, and we receive out of it.  We are entitled to the return.  Entitlement should not be a dirty word. 

The dictionary lists these 3 simple descriptions of entitlement:

: the condition of having a right to have, do, or get something

: the feeling or belief that you deserve to be given something (such as special privileges)

: a type of financial help provided by the government for members of a particular group

How slick and easy it is for people to interchange the meanings for their own gain.

People pay into the welfare system, unemployment system, Social Security system.  They should feel they have the right to collect when needed.  They DO have the right to collect.    And the honest will not collect anything they do not deserve.  So let’s not punish the honest because of the erring minority.

When it comes to affordable healthcare, I simply look at it as a way to help others and give equal acess to health.  Those in government who are offended at helping me reach a point of equality in attaining my healthcare do not believe in across-the-board equality.  Everyone is entitled to love.  Love gives until it hurts. Blaming the victim of bad healthcare practice management is an action of Bullies.

Tell the Mother of 4 diagnosed with breast cancer and unable to afford healthcare because her retail job doesn’t offer it, that she is NOT entitled to healthcare and I rise up with the sword of St. Michael to fight for the justice she deserves.  Tell the 68 year old woman - my mother) she cannot have a liver transplant because she is over 60 (Kaiser Permanente) and I reel with anger as I watch, at the same time, Mickey Mantle and Larry Hagman pay for their new livers and live.  I was happy for them, but devastated that my Mom had to go to the back of the line.  Where is the love in this that good health comes down to wealth or the lack there of and/or the generosity or lack of from the wealthy?

There is an argument that all healthcare will increase, and existing health insurance premiums will increase because of ACA.  Do not fool yourselves.  If you receive excellent healthcare benefits, I am helping to pay for them, even though I cannot afford my own.  The price of the product or service your company sells  - no matter what it is and how it is funded, includes the cost of your employment, including your health insurance and is paid for by the consumer.  It seems that it should be easy to see that all people should have some sort of access to affordable healthcare and that those working for companies too small for large group eligibility should have the opportunity to band together and form their own group.

Should this be legislated?  It was.  It is.  It was upheld in the Supreme Court and it is law. Laws can be repealed and there is a process for that.  Laws can be amend and there is a process for that.  Holding federal workers hostage is NOT a part of that process.

We are now entitled to receive this bludgeoned love.  But we are being held hostage and in the process, our lives are being endangered without the services our taxes are paying for….yes we do need our government services and during this hissy fit, bully-baby tactics, shut-down of the government, we are now a distracted country.  Distraction attracts terrorism.  Remember, one of the largest threats of the Taliban to America was they would see to our financial ruin -- the next attacks would not be on tall buildings but would undercut the stability of our financial institutions and processes.

It leads me to wonder where the Taliban learned it’s tactics.  How much have we taught them?  Holding each other hostage, breaking the law in the name of any god?  Re-reading this rant, that statement feels harsh.  But we are living in harsh times.

I preach love.  I believe everything should be done in love but sometimes I have to take a path of rage, walk in the fire, and then wallow in the dark before I can see the light of love again.

There is only one entitlement in the world.  Again, I say love one another.  Be kind to one another.  Be generous to one another.  Do not judge.  Encourage one another.  Speak in love.  Act in love.  Believe that love is all there is.

Love and be loved.  You, indeed, are entitled .  …forever and ever, even unto the end.


 Oh, and one more thing….I can never leave it alone, can I??? I think it is a person’s right to disagree with ACA.  I think it is okay to work to defund it if your don’t like it.  Heck, I even think it’s okay to work towards repealing it if you really hate it.  That is the American way.  What I think is appalling is when politicians decide to hold hard working tax-paying (read: THEY PAY YOUR WAGES) hostage because you think it’s okay to defund the plan at this point in time.  It is inappropriate behavior and I thank God my kids are raised and understand you may never give in to bullies.  If they behaved this way in front of me today, all six of them from age 21 to 34 would be held accountable in my presence.  It’s a sad day when  “Tea Party” means taking your ball home when the game doesn’t go your way, instead of a pleasant gathering of cheerful, loving people enjoying a cup of tea together.  Holding tea parties of this kind will never get you invited to one of mine and I’m sure you couldn’t care less.  Sigh…


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Love One Another

10/1/2013

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Apparently the phrase "Love One Another" appears 12 times in the Bible.  I don't want to become either political or overly religious in my blogging, but I will have days when I won't be able to hold back my heart.  

As the government shuts down, it seems increasingly that our leaders are teaching our children that it is okay to batter one another to get "thine own way."  We have a law that was passed and maybe isn't the best it can be, but it is a law that finally helps our poor, our needy, our middle class -- everyday people who just need an equal opportunity to be well.  It is a form of love. 

 I understand that we will never achieve the ability to love unconditionally, but it certainly can be a goal.  I state here, emphatically, that the withholding of love to anyone in any form is not on the road to perfect love.  I do know, that "perfect love casts out all fear."  For those who are fearful of their future and are now dependent on the actions of our leaders who seem motivated by schoolyard antics and bully tactics, I say, have faith, and hope.  Love endures all things.  Love does conquer all but sometimes it isn't pretty.  I say, to all sides in the political arena, "please remember the lessons our mothers and fathers have taught us."  Remember the Golden Rule.  Remember to be a friend.  You don't always have to be right and if you do, you're probably wrong.  It is never okay to hit.  Be helpful.  Be kind.  Think before you speak. Always let another person go first.  Help others.  If your friend forgot his lunch, give him your apple.  Share.  

And in the words of Mother Teresa, "Give until it hurts."


1 Corinthians 13The Message (MSG)


The Way of Love13 If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate.

2 If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing.

3-7 If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.
Love doesn’t strut,
Doesn’t have a swelled head,
Doesn’t force itself on others,
Isn’t always “me first,”
Doesn’t fly off the handle,
Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.


8-10 Love never dies. Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. We know only a portion of the truth, and what we say about God is always incomplete. But when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled.

11 When I was an infant at my mother’s breast, I gurgled and cooed like any infant. When I grew up, I left those infant ways for good.

12 We don’t yet see things clearly. We’re squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won’t be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We’ll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us!

13 But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.

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    Debi Flory

    I'm a Spiritual Director, Artist, Mom of six and grandmother of five.  I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up but I know I'm happiest when I'm making someone smile and laugh and  am honored to companion those seeking their soul stories.

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